Lex, I really don like to talk face to face. I don like the awkard feeling. I don like it when I have not prepare to talk about it. Whether you like it anot, whether you still want to know what happen not, I just gonna write this to you. I don like misunderstanding too.
Firstly, I don wish to invlove others when it is just the two of us matter. That day when you said about Man Chui saying that I and Shan are like that, do not say out anything when things happened. PLS DO NOT FORGET THAT IT WAS YOU WHO MAKE US SPEAK EVERYTHING OUT SO THAT REGRETFUL THING HAPPEN AND NEARLY BREAK OUR FRIENDSHIP. AND U STILL HAVE THE CHEEK TO MENTION! But things have been past and everything goes ok now. I might not be talking to Man Chui on msn but I still love her as a friend, a forever friend of mine. Even though it is still awkard for me to talk to her.
These few days your action and words and your msg make me don feel like talking to u at all. It is totally annoying and irritating. Maybe it was ME who misunderstood your all these actions and words again but it is just simply annoying that I don feel like bother you at all. I know I might hurt your feeling again since you mentioned you also have your own feelings. But from the day you tagged nonsense to my tagboard and I fight back, I just simply want you to know that we are not only one who are in wrong all these while. It is just as simple actually.
Okies. The things that make me said those words. I mentioned scar that never heal or feelings that cannot goes back. Okies. Why I mentioned all these? It is really big problem between us? NO. Totally NO. It is nothing serious actually thats why initially when you approach me I don I don wish to talk about it is because of it. (one of the reason only) Okies. Now your whole mind must be XiaoHuan's chalet right. Okies. That is really just a bonus to the whole situation. It is really just a bonus. If I really bet whole thing on that then why we still go out every week after you went in ns? Don forget your ns is right after XiaoHuan's Chalet.
I only remember during Nov last year, you suddenly told me that you cannot always accompany me and made it like it is my fault to keep bugging on you to accompany me! Idiot. You keep saying that you did not say it is my fault and I keep think that way. Why? Cos of your words and actions! I cant remember what it is your words and actions anymore since it is last year thingy. Okies. Since I cannot remember last year thingy I still can remember this year thingy. I remember you told me these few days one thingy. You mentioned that you have been down i your ns life and yet I blame you for cannot accompanying me and I keep mentioning that I might be going back to Malaysia and never come back. So these words means I am in fault larhz? You also mentioned that you got to draw a line between friend and girlfriend. But after that you keep on showing love and care for your friend. What is this? You want bother you bother you don wan bother you don wan bother? Idiot. Totally nonsense. Okies. Then we have our cold war that period and I gotten close with Shan.
So the second thingy that happen that make me feel further apart. Remember that time when you are drunk with your friend 21st birthday celebration? You called me while I and Shan are also nearby drinking. You wana talk about it straight away at the time you are drunk. I and Shan do not want to talk about it and you act like emo drunker. A while MIA, a while want go home a while don wan go home. It is totally irritating also. When we managed to ask RenLi for help and he tried to help us to ask you home. And you get into a fight with another drunker and you agitated him like wana get beaten up. You totally annoying. But during that time, as a friend, we still accompanying you till you want go home. I thought you might calm down since you are not that drunk anymore during the morning. You intial a breakfast and I din think of anything and just agree with it. But when the moment we sat down and our breakfast come, you start to talk about the thing, whether I wish to hear not. Do you know that it is really irritating to do that? To force people to listen to your crap at the point I have no mood for it?
Same matter that happen this time. I do not know if I am wrong. But I truely think that you purposely went to the boat quay on last Thursday knowing I am going there too. After I promised you that I will give you a face to face talk this week and warned you not to appear at my gathering place and spolit my party, you still insisted on appearing there. You made yourself so pity and made it that it is like my fault when you keep wanting to see Michelle. You know Michelle is with me. You know you cannot contact me and you can contact Michelle. You know we are at which pub. You make Michelle see that it is my fault to treat you like that. Cos you want to save back this friendship and yet I don wan. You want to talk to me and yet I don wan. You are just next to the pub I am yet you are not allow to step near me. You made yourself so pitiful so that Michelle keep helping you to ask me talk to you. You even make RenLi to come to me to ask me to talk to you. Pity RenLi. He thought he gonna make it as usual but he never will thought that things actually made worse. Okies. We finally get to talk. No. Is you finally got the chance to talk. But I still don wish to say anything cos it was so unneccessary. You cried. You continue to drunk yourself. What is this? Why you need to make it so serious? I totally don get it. It is just a simple blog post that I blogged and you make it to this stage.
Maybe you don understand. I really don like it to say by people. When they ask me izzit that you are my boyfriend? Izzit that we got ai mei? We look like scandal. Why people will think of these? You never thought of that? Maybe it is still possible for girls and boys to be forever good friend. But as Michelle has said. If you cannot accpet the person bad points you cannot be friend with that person. I actually sincerely want to be normal friend with you. But you make it damn worse now. So... So be it..............
That day, you insisted on talking about this. You make yourself like a drunk guy and irritated my friend. You spolit my mood and also spoilt my friend mood. The second day, your actual celebration. You keep on acting drunk in front of me, Shan and Lilian. Whats that about man? I don get it. Lex, truly. I also would like to draw line between you and me. If you still want to be normal friend I okies. If not sayonara. Okies? Childish enough. Lets stop it!
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